Starting school...

Starting a new school can be an anxious time for children and parents, quite understandably. New teachers feel anxious too! However, for young children and their parents it can be particularly difficult. Expectations and emotional investment can be high, and while the majority settle in smoothly, it is quite normal for the process to take some time. You can never tell which child is likely to find the transition difficult: sometimes it can be one who has seemed very confident and outgoing before, so don’t be surprised or unduly shaken if there are teething troubles. Here are a few tips which might help:

• Before they start, take them to see the school, even if only from the outside, or show them photos from the website or prospectus, so that it becomes a little more familiar.

• Try to meet up in advance with other children who will also be starting.

• Talk positively about school beforehand.

• Have everything ready the night before, so the day gets off to a good, calm start, and try to keep this up.

• When it’s time to leave them, say goodbye and go. Don’t linger or keep popping back as it will give the message that you are anxious or cannot bear to be parted from the child, who will pick this up. Children nearly always settle down quickly once you have gone, and the teachers are very used to distracting and calming children in these early days.

• Make sure they know who is collecting them.

• If your child comes home telling you about things which have gone wrong, sympathise but don’t over-react. Ask them about the good things that happened as well, and give them just as much attention as the bad. Children often save up the negative news for home and forget the 99% of the day that was fine.

• Try not to plunge too quickly into a range of after school activities and social events. Children will be experiencing a steep learning curve in a new environment, and will be very tired.

• Make sure they go to bed at a sensible time.

• Some children don’t make any ‘special’ friends to start with, and may change friends frequently. This is quite normal.

• Give them time to settle in, and remember that children progress at different rates. Don’t expect everything to be perfect from the start, but do talk to the school if your concerns persist. They will have had a great deal of experience helping different children to settle and enjoy school.

This article also appeared on The Times – School Gate blog