Mobile phones - when, where and how much?

When is the right time for my daughter to have a mobile phone?

• Mobile phones play a key role in ensuring pupil safety travelling to and from school. Girls need phones to be able to communicate with parents to arrange pick-ups or to keep them informed when the buses and trains are running late. They afford a degree of protection to the lone traveller and thus give reassurance to parents. Once your daughter is involved in after-school clubs, particularly ones that involve pick-ups after it has got dark, it makes sense for her to have a cheap, basic phone for emergencies.

• There is no doubt that parents come under considerable pressure from their daughters who argue, in time-honoured fashion, that “everyone else has got one”. As with other areas, such as parties, curfews and alcohol, parents need to establish good lines of communication with other parents, so that they are not all played off against each other.

What about 3G mobile phones with Internet capability?

• The problem with phones that have internet connectivity is that girls immediately have unrestricted internet access. On the positive side this will enable them to look up useful information and to support their learning. However, it also means that they will be able to get onto social networking sites, such as Facebook.

• Mobile devices with Internet capability [either through dialling up or through Wifi] are here to stay – indeed they are going to be ubiquitous. We will not be able to restrict what our daughters are doing with them, so we need to ensure that they are cybersafe and need to educate them to use them wisely. Parents need to consider if their daughter has sufficient maturity to make positive use of a phone with internet capability, whilst avoiding the inherent dangers and temptations.

How can I control how much my daughter uses her mobile?

• Girls love chatting – they always have. Many of those of us who are now parents sat for hours on the family phone chatting to our friends. Today young people just have more ways to chat: talking face to face, texting, on their mobiles, on MSN, on Facebook and so on. The most significant difference is that, rather than chatting in the relatively public place at the bottom of the stairs, it is all much more private – away from parental eyes and ears. What is interesting is that young people communicate much more now by the written word than ever before.

• The best way for parents to retain a degree of control over their daughter’s use of their mobile phone is to limit the amount of credit that she has on the phone. A package that has unlimited number of texts, may appear attractive from a financial perspective, but it does give a green light to your daughter to spend an enormous amount of time texting.

• Pay-as-you-go contracts are best for young teens. Ultimately they give you greater control over your daughter’s use of the phone. If the phone is in your name and you top up with small amounts at the time, you will monitor how much your daughter is using the phone and also be able to have regular conversation about her phone use.

Should mobile phones be allowed in schools?

• Mobile phones clearly can be a distraction in lessons [texting under the desk etc.], but they can also be a great use [pupils taking photographs of the board or of an experiment for example].

• Short of putting silver foil over all the windows, it is impossible to stop girls using phones in schools. They need to learn what is and what is not appropriate use. Most schools have an acceptable use policy which will outline the school’s stance on this matter.

This article also appears in Mark Steed’s blog An Independent Head