How can I raise my 10 year old daughter's self esteem?
Q. My 10 year old daughter seems to be suffering from low self esteem. What can I do to increase it and build her own self-belief?
A. The key here is to praise, care and nurture your daughter. Praise her effort rather than her achievement, care for her by listening to her attentively and nurture her by giving her your unconditional love. Show her that we learn through making mistakes and feel good about ourselves when we succeed in reaching reasonable goals which we have chosen.
If you can try to identify the particular area that is causing her to feel bad about herself. Is it lack of academic success or lack of social success? Are there any issues at home? By listening to her and discussing what is troubling her you can help her to take a more balanced view and perhaps offer some solutions. Consider encouraging her to invite friends over to the house more regularly and allow her to develop the talents and natural gifts she has with lots of positive encouragement.
In order to have strong self esteem your daughter needs to feel valued, successful and able to achieve so try to find opportunities for her to succeed, help her identify her strengths and celebrate them with her.
Zoe Dunn, The Royal School Hampstead
Helen Stone, St Francis College, Herts
Felicity Taylor, Queens’ Lower School Chester
Jo Wallace, Putney Junior High School GDST
Julie Windett, Greenacre School for Girls